Taking the vapours...

The last Sunday of the month often involves a trip to that shining metropolis known as Luton to join the more hirsute types at the Gentleman's health spa. I will admit to being rather fond of saunas. They are nice places to chill out, take the steam and heat, enjoy the view and have some interesting sexual encounters. There's something awfully levelling about wandering around in nothing but a towel and unlike darkrooms you can actually see what/who you are doing and make informed choices.

Sadly my trip on Sunday was relatively dissatisfying. The bears really weren't biting and the couple of nibbles I did have were a bit, well, odd.

1) Very very handsome chap. Italian or French I think. Youngish (late 20s/early 30s), goatee, hairy chest, fairly tall, slimish and a *huge* cock. Anyway - he does the casual grope as I pass him thing, which leads to a bit of mutal groping then I follow him into a cubicle. He then won't kiss me, or even let me touch his cock, and keeps groping my arse. Call me a prick tease, but even in a sauna I like to have a bit of foreplay even if I *was* going to let him fuck me (and that really wasn't likely). After a few minutes of seeing if I could turn the situation into anything even remotely interesting I made a hasty exit. Amusingly he kept giving me dirty looks for the rest of the afternoon.

2) Older chap. Not sure about his age but he looked very distinguished with short greying hair. No facial hair, but lots of lovely salt n pepper body hair. Messed around with him a bit in the hot sauna then bumped into him a bit later when I was wandering around and took him into one of the private rooms. This guy did kiss, but that rather unfortunate lip pecking thing rather than proper snogging. Despite this I persevered and had a pleasant time sucking his rather nice cock (cut cock and trimmed pubes - the best kind of cock to suck IMO, nothing worse than pubes between your teeth!).

3) Chap in the steam room. Short and skinny, but nicely hairy with a lovely beard. This guy was very strange - I don't know what his 'thing' was, but he kept spitting on me! Then he started putting is fingers in my ears and nose! Thank fuck the showers were just outside - as I really felt the need to have a shower after I had extricated myself from his embrace. I didn't get a snog from him either!

4) Finally things get a bit better! During a final stalk around I bump into a guy I've met the last few times I've been to the bears day. Finally I get to have a proper snog! He's also a great shag - which makes up for the fingers-in-ears-guy!

A Prince among men...

As I said in my last post - I like piercings, particularly genital piercings.  For years I was fascinated by the idea of a Prince Albert piercing and one of the things I did before I hit 30 (which at the time seemed very significant and old - I was wrong, the 30s are much better than the 20s - but I digress) was get this piercing done.  For those that are unaware a Prince Albert (supposedly named after Queen Victoria's husband who was purported to have one of this then fashionable 'dressing rings' used to hide any bulging in tight Victorian trousers) is a ring that goes through the urethra and comes out the bottom of  the penis.  The addition of a ring through that part of your body offers the chance of stimulating lots of nerve endings that wouldn't otherwise be stimulated.  This is a good thing.

One thing I have found is that my PA is often fascinating to prospective sexual partners.  I've had quite a few guys who say to me 'I don't usually get fucked, but...' (I'm not sure I entirely believe them - but I can be a sucker for topping a top) and most have questions.

Will it hurt?

 Surprisingly this is a very common question.  I'm not sure why they think I would have something in my cock that would hurt the guy I'm fucking, but I guess it can look a little intimidating.  Short answer - quite the contrary.  Depending on the position the ring can be *right* on the prostate, which on some guys is the fabled 'male g spot', and can really enhance the sensation.

Can you take it out?

This depends on what jewellery I have in and where we are.  At the moment I'm wearing a 3mm BCR - which really can' t be removed without tools.  If I had the equipment to hand and its really a problem him I'll take it out.  But yanno, see question one!  Generally I prefer to wear a CBB - as I find this more comfortable and it can be easily taken out.

Is it safe with condoms?

I've never had a condom break on me - either with or without the PA in.  The ring itself is smooth, with no sharp bits that are likely to tear a condom (or hurt a guy - again, see question one!).  Condoms are stretchy enough for even large jewellery to pose no problem.

Did it hurt having it done?

Yes - but it wasn't that bad (nipple was much worse) as its going through a fairly small piece of skin.  It bled a lot the first couple of days - but after that it was fine.  Heals in about two weeks - which is one of the fastest healing piercings you can have done.

So yeah - I'm a fan of my PA and keep toying with having something else down there pierced.  One of my fuck-buds has a guiche - which is v v sexy, but I'm a bit of a fat git for that and I think it would be an pita to heal.  The same fuck-bud also has scrotal piercings - which are also very sexy.  Scrotal piercings are one of the worst for migrating (healing out) but I think that's what I'd like to get done next, or maybe on the shaft of the penis (but that takes quite a while to heal and I'd end up with balls like melons while it was!).  Hmm - decisions, decisions...

Type casting...

One of the big attractions of the bear scene is that it is full of men that tend to be 'my type' (insomuch as I have a type - my long-term partner doesn't fit my type in any way shape or form).

So - what do I like in a guy and what makes them 'my type'? There is a danger of making this into a check list and getting into a mind set of only being interested in guys that tick all the boxes. This isn't really the case, there's all manner of things that make a guy sexy, and finding a guy sexy is definitely the place to start for a good time! This is just some of the things that come into my mind as turn ons.

Body hair, preferably lots of it. I'm a hairy beast myself and I imagine it is a fairly narcissistic thing, but I do love a man with a hairy chest and belly. Blond guys with with beards and a hairy chest are a big turn on - I suspect this may have something to do with rarity value (and possibly a crush on a PE teacher at a v impressionable age).

While we're on the subject of hirsute men, a word on beards. I love blokes with beards and the current trend for them has screwed up my beardar rather. A short goatee or a nicely trimmed full beard is really sexy and I love kissing a bearded fella. It also makes for excellent blowjobs!

I like blokes to have a bit of meat on their bones. Really skinny, boney guys don't do much for me at all. What I like about the bear scene is that it is fairly forgiving - you don't have to be a muscled up adonis and having a bit of a belly is usually a positive thing! I generally prefer guys on the taller side of things too - 5'11" or more. I guess I like guys that have a lot of physical presence.

So - thats his physicality dealt with. What else do I like?

Good kissing is *essential*. If a bloke doesn't kiss, or pecks away like a budgie at its seed I'm not going to have a good time. I can spend a lot of time kissing so its important to me.

Tattoos/piercings. There is something about tattooed skin that makes me want to touch it. I have a few tattoos myself and I just love them on other guys. Piercings also greatly increase the pleasure I (and him I hope!) get from touching, kissing and sucking. Genital piercings are very horny!

Foreplay. I like to take time and really get to experience a guy's body. Its easy to get a bit focussed on penetration and orgasm - but some of the best sessions I've had haven't involved anal sex and neither of us came!

Safe sex. This should go without saying - but you'd be amazed at how many people are into bareback fucking. I wouldn't lecture a guy on this - he's an idiot so what's the point? I *do* get very cross with people that don't respect my choice and try to get me to fuck them without a condom (I've literally had to shove blokes away when they suddenly try and get my cock up their arse without a condom).

While we are on the topic of turn offs - one big turn off for me is being told what to do. Some guys have these fantasies worked out in there heads and they seem to be checking things off a list. I'm not a porn star nor a performing seal! Sex is always much more interesting when you make it up as you go along! I'm not saying I don't like to be told what is/isn't working for a guy, I just don't want to be made to feel like I'm following instructions, sex shouldn't be like making an Ikea desk!